Mothers' Day

We win.
No one knows it but us.

But we do.

We are the parents of kids with disabilities who get to see the true value of our children. Though it can hurt, we get past what we thought our children would become. Though it’s painful, we get beyond whatever society decides what our children can or can’t do. And, no matter what we used to think, we stand up to build the life our children need, want and deserve.

We go beyond our past ideas, to the gift of the child that is. Our world view explodes... and then expands.

We struggle. We worry. Sometimes we rage. Sometimes we cry.

And…

We are the lucky ones.

We get to know miracles. We know just exactly what it takes to learn. We know just how many muscles must respond to make a person able to walk or talk. We know just how the process of language unfolds and what it really means when it works or when it doesn’t. Reading, writning and arithmetic are more than assumptions for us.

We get to figure out what really matters. We know about justice (and injustice.) We know stuff we never thought we would or could.

We treasure moments.

And, no matter what society sees or understands, we know that love is not about ability or response to intervention or any other standard or value. We know the meaning of and the reasons for ‘fierce.’

We change the world.

Unconditional is us.

It's not easy, but we get to see behind the curtain.

We are challenged. We are stressed. We fight like tigers and sometimes we are frazzeled to the bone.

And we are blessed.

Happy Mothers’ Day to all of us!

Five Things I Love About Being A Mother

I was sent this meme by Rickismom and thought it would be fun to play along. I am responding kind of late to this, but that is ok because if I had tried this a week or two ago I would only have been able to comment on laundry and dishes and the thousand other tasks that were overwhelming me. I think I can do better than that this week.

1. I love being in a family that looks out for each other, cares about each other and has fun together.

2. I love that I have watched these kids grow and develop from the beginning--seeing how their various personalities and strengths have played out and I love looking forward to even more of this as they reach adulthood.

3. I love the ways my children have expanded my life. They have introduced me to music, foods, interests, people, and parts of the world that I would never have seen or known about but for their interest.

4. I love the way motherhood has made me a stronger and more confident woman. A teenage girl asked my son how I stood up to the schoolboard on an issue a couple of years ago--he shrugged and he guessed it was because I'm a mom. He was right, I'd never really needed to advocate until I had kids to advocate for--now try and stop me!

5. I love how my kids support each other (even in the midst of heavy teasing!) My daughter teaches my son the phrase of a song, my son accompanies my daughter to the gas station when she needs gas after dark, my youngest daughter watches the clock and reminds her sister that it's time for work.

I pass this along to Terena at Gravity Check and Alison at The Bernard Bunch (if the Princess doesn't mind!)